Don't like the mood of a group? Change it.

When the tone of a social gathering becomes too confrontational, negative, lewd, insensitive, prejudiced, or otherwise distasteful, you needn't remain at the mercy of it. It takes nerve, but speak up, intercede, try to steer things back into positive territory. Offenders may be taken aback, even disdainful, but those who share your discomfort will welcome the intervention. Too often we let situations deteriorate beyond what we find acceptable and may be hesitant to address it. But that only helps make things worse. Try changing the bad vibes. And if you can't, make a statement by politely excusing yourself and leaving.

Posted Thursday, September 02, 2010